John Kaine's non CV

It is essential not to have a CV. They, CVs, are simply a list of all the things one used to do, or be, or is not doing, or once was in an attempt to modify, to advantage, the perception of who one is or might be seen as.

However in line with the accepted form of boast I am

  1. The world's fastest artist.
  2. The inadvertent inventor of "Paint Ball".
  3. The author of the world's longest print edition. One million copies numbered in hexadecimal.
  4. The maker of the world's first art work to carry instructions.
  5. The inventor of the "Eternal Wristwatch".

On the down side I open boxes I cannot close and write theories about things that I do not understand. I leave blogs all over the internet and worry about solipsism. A lot of what we think exists does not. The reason for this is because it is a memory. It may have existed or occurred yesterday, today it is history, it is a perceived record of what once was. This is the problem with CVs.

I am armed and dangerous is significant.
I used to own a tin of sardines when I was seventeen is not.

What you have to decide is:

Do you think my work is any good?
I take regular medication

Do you think my work is any good?
I am married to Lydia

Do you think my work is any good?
I am in the Guinness Book of Records

Do you think my work is any good?
I own a black Julius Keilwerth saxophone

Do you think my work is any good?
I have represented the UK

Do you think my work is any good?
I took part in a consumer survey

Do you think my work is any good?
I might not be able to meet the late entry requirements

Do you think my work is any good?
I failed my National Service medical

Do you think my work is any good?
I have a Sainsbury's loyalty card

Do you think my work is any good?
The above is an iterative process that can go on almost indefinitely Answer the question yes or no.
Alternatively have a tea break

Please select a biscuit
As this is a virtual biscuit, the consequence of selection will be virtual.